Steve McNair and Gun Control

Steve McNair was found fatally shot next to the 20 year old woman who apparently murdered him prior to taking her own life. I take notice of this mostly because I am a sports fan and watched Steve McNair play in the NFL for many years.

Not long after the announcement of his shooting death, I saw a post on Twitter that said if this does not call for more gun control nothing does. Really? Do we need to infringe upon our constitutional rights because of an instance such as this?

I have to disagree.

Let's look a little closer at this tragic event and I think I see a better solution.

Steve McNair was a married man and he was not married to the woman who killed him. He rented the condo in which he was killed with another person, not his wife. A few days prior to the shooting McNair and the woman who eventually killed him were pulled over by police in a car that is registered to McNair and this woman, who again, is not his wife. Witnesses say they saw McNair arrive at the condo where he was later found dead about 1:30 AM on July 4 and this woman's car was already there.

It does not take much imagination to come up with some scenarios of what was going on between Steve McNair and this 20 year old woman that killed him. But let's just call what Steve was doing a "marital indiscretion." What the real problem here is not a gun.

If we some how get rid of the gun from this situation, would there still be a troubled marriage and would McNair's 4 children be distraught over problems with their father's infidelity? My guess is yes.

If we got rid of the infidelity or indiscretion, and left the gun, would Steve McNair still be alive? There is no way to answer that now.

Regardless, I don't see this situation as a major statement for a need of more gun control.

Twitter

So I have been Twittering for a few months. I like to think there is a way that this medium can drive business for me but I jut refuse to believe the only way is through all of those schemes that promise to get you thousands of followers for a small investment.

And why is it that the only people that follow you are people that are "amps" (whatever that is) and self proclaimed Internet marketing gurus?

I am not having any real dialogue and quite frankly it is not all that fun or satisfying.

So why am I on Twitter again?

Gotta have a plan

With the groundswell of Web 2.0 or Social Media combined with the "ground shrink" of new dollars being spent on marketing, especially print, I have been working diligently to understand and social media and work it in to the mix of services that I can provide to my clients.

One thing has become clear that with a business person entering into Social Media they need to begin first with a plan. Goals that will direct your efforts and tell you whether you have been successful or not and tell you when course correction needs to be made. This is true with any marketing venture but it is surprising how few businesses actually have the plan first.

Isn't it true, or wouldn't it be nice to think that all businesses would start first with a complete business plan and a set of goals to aid in their direction and course corrections. I wonder sometimes how many actually do have the plan first.

Then the thought occurs to me the most important plan is your own life plan, and wouldn't it be wonderful if we all had a life plan before we launched into life? Sadly, most infants don't have the capabilities to make such plans.

I was pondering this yesterday when it struck me that someone does have a plan for our lives prior to us starting out.

"The Lord called me before my birth. From within the womb he called me by my name...He said to me, `You are my servant'..." (Isaiah 49:1,3 TLB); "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb" (Psalm 139:13)

So it is our job to find the plan the God has laid out before us.

Somehow in the dark moments of a long week that was a comforting thought!

Irrational Exuberance

It has been about 13 years since Alan Greenspan talked about Irrational Exuberance in reference to stock market prices. At the time the Dow Jones Industrial Average had just marched past 6K.

As the DJA struggles to recover the heavy losses over the last year I am bracing today because the stock indexes point to a lower day. Why? The report was we are seeing lower than expected housing starts.

Was it irrational exuberance that made anyone think there would be any thing but disappointment in those reports? Foreclosures on a roll, credit at a standstill and unemployment higher than it has been in years. And someone with their finger on the pulse of things felt housing starts would not drop last month.

We live, I think, in a society that is totally irrational. There is from what I have heard and read (yes, sources unspecified here) a puzzlement why we as a society did not take precautions earlier than we did to prevent problems in the economy. Most of us knew the housing bubble was going to burst, credit was too easy for too long and there was too much of it and stock prices were really high and had been for little apparent reason.

Perhaps this is the result of our growing more and more dependent on soundbites for our news, filtering out what we don't want to hear. We hear, we like, and we get all excited and run with it.

That is what I would call irrational

Of course if the DJIA jumps today, I was wrong about at least a part of this post.

So why do we listen to these guys

Yesterday the Dow Jones Industrial average was down, again. The reason given for the loss was lower than expected retail sales for last month. Really? Just what did they truly expect? Because people feel better with warmer weather suddenly they will go out and pick cash off the money tree in the back yard? To me it is just another reason to question why we listen to the media at all. They have NO CLUE what is going on. How about the panic that was created by the Swine Flu? Where is the predicted pandemic?

Seven things that can drive this salesman batty

Asking for sympathy for the sales person is a little like asking people to feel sorry for your sore muscles after working out for an hour when you have not worked out in years. But it occurred to me today as I was hearing a list of excuses that there are 7 nonsensical things I hear from prospects that can drive me batty.

For instance:

1. You call someone on the phone and as should be done introduce yourself and ask if this is an okay time to talk, and they say "not really, I am in a meeting." If you are truly in a meeting, then why did you pick up the phone? If a ringing phone is so intriguing you have to stop this alleged meeting to pick it up, then go with the intrigue, let's talk! Really now, you can't come up with something more original or more honest like, "I am really tired and stressed right now and no matter what you say I won't listen so maybe this is not a good time." In a meeting? Comon!
2. This one is a lot like the first one. You place a phone call and introduce yourself and ask if this is an okay time to talk and they say "I am on the other line." Again, if the other call was that important why does a ringing phone demand you interrupt that conversation? Why don't you simply let the call go to voice mail. Then you have the opportunity to ignore the message (come on we all hide behind voice mail)or ignore the ringing altogether.
3. Then there are the times that you introduce yourself and your product that you are selling and the prospect tells you: "we have been with our current supplier for 100 years and they have never made a mistake." I am all for long term relationships and I believe they are the best way to get the best value out of the things you buy. But if all the people who told me they have a long term relationship with their current supplier really have had that long of a relationship, about 90% of the businesses in any given field should shutter their businesses now.
4. Ever wonder where all the money has gone? It was all spent on the product you sell just last week or month or last year and will not be spent on that product again for 5-7 years. No wonder all the people that have seniority in the companies I have worked for all drive BMWs.
5. The current supplier is friends/neighbors/went to school with the owner of the company. I knew it! I did join the wrong fraternity in college. Actually I never did join one, maybe that is the problem. Otherwise there appears to be a really incredible neighborhood somewhere in the world where all suppliers and owners live next to each other, never tick each other off and are happily spending large amounts of money with each other. And I don't live there. Drat!
6. The one the bothers me and probably most other sales people the most is the one for CSI. This is where they drop off the face of the earth. This is where you have conversations, good conversations about the needs a prospect has and narrow down solutions to their problems and then suddenly after weeks of phone calls, emails and voice mails returned your new found friend suddenly disappears! Voicemails are no longer returned, emails are not responded to. Have they had a death in the family? Perhaps horrendous things have happened to them like they have been kidnapped and they are being tortured by some radical fundamentalist group. Okay, so the reality is for whatever reason the deal is not going down now and maybe never. So they can't send a message saying sorry we are not moving ahead with the project or we are going with someone else? It may be a little uncomfortable but it would save us both a lot of time.
   
7. Then there is more of an add-on that every sales person has heard before and after a year or two in sales you realize the line of bull you are getting. But you still hear "if you do really good on this project and give us a discounted price there is a lot more business to follow." I don't think there are any comments needed for this one.

So from the top of my head and out of my frustration of not being as good as I want to be there are the 7 blow offs that drive me batty. There are legitimate reasons for each one and I understand that 8 out of 10 people I talk to in any given day are going to tell me no, either for legitimate reasons or just because they are not feeling well or are having a bad or whatever. I just wish that in addition to a better response from my end that there would be a little more originality in the excuses.

Well there is good news and there is bad news, it is the same thing, it is only Tuesday night!

Baffled, no, frustrated and a little confused

Sometimes sales feel like you are sticking your finger in a dike. As soon as you plug one hole another one appears and then another and then another.

I had been trying to get into an account for a couple of months when suddenly last month there was an opening. This company's current printer had disappointed them with the final product, bad colors, wrong paper. Another printer had refused to help them adjust their proofs and charged them exorbitantly for it. I suddenly have a chance! Of all the prospective new printers I was the only one who took the time to travel to see them. I provided references, I provided a variety of sales samples, I even had one of if not the very lowest price. And? They decided to go back to one of the printers that had screwed them over for their current project.

Sometimes it just takes a lot to make a change, even if it is going back to the person that has caused you problems.

I did pose the question what would make them think that after all I had done to earn their business what would ever make them think I would give them anything less than superior service and an excellent product. Probably ticked them off, but oh well, I wasn't getting anything out of them any way.

Three more thoughts.
1 This was a government agency, it is nice to know our tax dollars are at work, and it is easy to jack people that are on commission around when you are on a government salary.
2. No wonder some printers have jacked them around a little, if they jack printers around like this.
3. Once again, there was one more person I should have met and sold to that I did not and that person held enough power to cost me.

Live and learn. I just wish it was all easier and I was better.

Hey I am finally back

Oh my, it is a little, alright very dusty in here! I haven't posted in about a year and a half. New job since then. Unfortunately this has been probably the worst time to change jobs and start building an account list from a list of leads. Yeah, the economy has been kicking my butt. However, here is what I believe, some things are more important than money. I mean, while selling tradeshow exhibits I had a migraine headaches at least once a month or once a week. Now, once in a while. There is a lot to be said about finding a job that fits your personality. Now let's see if we can make it pay. Have a need for commercial print? How about we talk about PURLs or social network marketing?

Please do not wish me Happy Birthday

January 20. That's the day. Every four years in the USA it is inauguration day, the day the president is sworn in. And yearly it is my birthday. And on that day please greet me with good morning, good afternoon and good night, congratulate me on making it another year and hopefully another year wiser. But please do not wish me happy birthday.

Six years ago one of the best friends I have ever had in the whole world, Phil Oster, died suddenly on January 20. He left behind his wife and twin daughters who were turning 16 at the time.

Then January 20, 2008 his wife, Julie died after a battle with cancer. Leaving behind twin daughters who are now just 22. Think about that, 22 and no parents to go home to, ever.

So, please do not wish me happy birthday! Ever

A matter of perspective

I had a very thought provoking and interesting chance to view different perspectives the other day.

My wife and I were at a house closing earlier this week. Our lawyer, Jeff, who we knew from the church we had been attending up until recently, suddenly was unable to attend the closing. He had a partner Jim who could fill in. Jim was also an acquaintance from a church we had attended years ago. As closing do from time to time this one kind of fell apart and what was to be an hour of signing papers turned into an odd 2-3 hour afternoon trying to iron things out. Things did not get resolved that day, but that is a story for another time.

We had spent some time talking with Jim about his family and especially his daughter, Michelle who is the same age as our oldest daughter, Erin. Michelle and Erin had been to each other's birthday parties when they were much younger and played on the same soccer team. Jim told us how Michelle has been studying at a university down state and is studying international studies. She is going to a friend's wedding in Australia soon and then will be studying abroad in Europe immediately after she returns. She is obviously doing very well.

Erin, has chosen a different path and is now expecting her second child as she and her husband are looking forward to having many more children. And by the way I could not be prouder of how she has grown to be a terrific wife and mother.

Then came the moment of fascinating perspective.

Jeff returned from the appointment that had kept him from the closing and in the course of some casual conversation said to his partner Jim that Erin was "ahead" of Michelle.It was so fascinating to be on the outside of this conversation, knowing Jeff's perspective on life and what it means to be "ahead" and knowing Jim's perspective on life and what it means to be "ahead".

It was an intriguingly rich moment of life!

The Columbus Syndrome

This month we celebrated Columbus Day. Columbus, like many other historic figures, is today both revered and maligned.

In the cruel light of time we can take a look at Columbus and say that in the famous year of 1492 when he sailed the ocean blue, he did not really know where he was going. When he reached his destination he did not know where he was and when he returned he did not know where he had been!We can relate that to business and life and see the Columbus Syndrome. Many people and businesses don't truly know where they are going, don't know where they are once they get there and when they return they are not sure where they have been. I personally and professionally struggle with this a lot. I constantly have to reassess where I am and where I am going. Sometimes I am sure I haven't a clue!

We can let Columbus off the hook though. He used the information that was available to him at the time and did more with it than anyone else did so he went down in history.Today there is many more tools available to us that help us direct our lives, our businesses and (of course I was going to say this) trade shows. So unlike Columbus, we have little excuse for being fuzzy about destinations and directions. The information is usually there.

We just have to look for it--and use it.

An Inauspicious Anniversary

It was about 3:30 in the afternoon on Thursday when I walked in the back door of my home and entered the family to view the surprised faces looking at a dad who was home early from work.

“Honey, I have some very bad news.”

And so I began to break the news to my wife that I had just been fired from the job of mine that she loved so much. It was close to home, I enjoyed the industry and for the past few years it had been a great blessing to us. She had just told some close friends how much she enjoyed my job three days prior.

And now? Now we start over again.

In a lot of ways it seems really hard to believe it has been a year and in a lot of ways things have changed so much that it is hard to believe it has only been a year. The cacophony of feelings and thoughts that occur when one of your worst fears come to fruition is astounding. And talk about being hit with some fears. Being fired you suddenly realize your fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of humiliation along with about 12 other fears you did not realize you had, at once.

But as this bungee jump into the abyss of unknown seemed like it would end in just a six week period that I spent networking and digging for a job, it did not. And that has turned out to be a very good thing and a source of continued enlightenment.

Sales is one of those careers where you can either do the basics and produce results and make a real solid living or you believe that luck will work for you as it has for the others around you that are successful and then suddenly find out you are a journeyman, average or below and facing the idea that maybe you should be doing something else for a living.

Unfortunately I found myself with the latter.

I know for a fact that a time like this is a time where you learn who your friends are. You know friends are the ones that will come to your funeral but a really good friend is one that comes to your funeral and does not check his watch in the middle of the service. This is a time when you need some really good friends to direct you encourage you and help you keep your sanity.

You also find out who your enemies are. And, as so often is the case, our bad habits are our worst enemies. And our bad habits and destructive behaviors are not ourselves so I hesitate to say we are our own worst enemy. But sometimes it takes a cold slap in the face to make us come to the realization that something is wrong and something needs to change. Hmm, sounds like when an alcoholic hits rock bottom.

For a long time I felt I had been struggling in my sales career feeling that I had brakes on my life. I had asked a few people if they knew what I was doing wrong or what was different about me that made me get lesser results. No one I asked seemed to know. Of if they knew, they were afraid to be honest with me. In this past year I found it was me not being honest with myself that produced my bad habits and poor results. My problems were right in front of me and had been there for so long that I just accepted the problem as being me, feeling that is just the way I am.

As a side note, and I will try to connect this quickly, I suffer from migraine headaches. The kind of headaches I get are probably best described as ocular migraines. The symptoms are first shown as a spot in the vision, kind of like someone has just flashed a bright light in my eyes and my vision has not gone back to normal. This spot interferes with my vision until with my vision so bad that I cannot make out faces but know they are there, or makes it impossible for me to see the letters on my keyboard, though I know they are there. Well, such was the problems with my sales career. They were there in front of me but I could not really see it.

So, what was the problem? I first thought it was a self esteem thing. And it was. Getting fired did not help that at all at first. Then I thought it may be a sales training issue. So I got some CDs to listen to and seminars to go to. These helped too.

But then came the day that I was listening to my Brian Tracy CD in which he started to talk about fear. “Yeah, right, I don't have any fear”. But he suggested I go through a little exercise and write down the major fears and then figure out which was my number one fear. I messed around with this project for a little bit thinking fear of failure may be causing my problem. Then I stumbled on to it and it hit me like a ton of bricks!

Fear of rejection. I wrote down how it had affected me in my life, how it had hurt me in the past and how it had helped me and what my life would be like without it. As I was writing this down all of a sudden I started writing page after page of how this stupid fear had controlled my life! It had been there all this time, like that ocular migraine, blocking my progress which I could sort of see but not really reach because I was blinded.

Finally, I found what the problem was. What a cathartic thing this was, what a relief and freedom I felt.
After all, diagnosis is more than half the cure. So that was the beginning my journey to be released from my fear. It continues and probably will for the rest of my life, but having some rational concepts to deal with it allows me to feel the fear but not be paralyzed by it.

The growing and changing has just begun and I am glad I have found the answer to the problem. I promise you I will call Terry, the person who fired me, to thank him when I feel thankful. I hope he does not spend too much time waiting by the phone!

Back to the events right after I walked in the door that Thursday afternoon a year ago. After stressing and sighing together for a while, I had a chance to take my daughter to her music class since I was home in time. As I reached the door to take her, I stopped and said to everyone still in the house:

“And guys, don't worry. Everything will be just fine.” I was more trying to convince myself than them. But here 365 days later, I have to say we are all better off for what happened that day.

Since hope is no longer my strategy, I cannot say I hope we don't have to go through that again, so I will simply say we are putting together processes that will protect us from being put in that position again.

Now, if you will excuse me, I must go find someone else to reject me. Face the fear and feel the power!

What was lost now is found

My first adventure in to the blogoshpere ended not so well when I forgot my log in name and my password. So now I know where it is and maybe I can have a couple of blogs going.....yeah, probably not.

As with 80,000 other people a day, I am taking my first adventure into the blogosphere. And other than that I don't have any deep thoughts to post. Funny how I have thought about starting this blog for about two years, finally get empowered to do it and come up dry in the inspiration department. Isn't that always the way? Finally get to where you thought you wanted to be and it is not as great as you had thought it would be.